A game of many colons, a game I remember playing so well. Dodging guards, bullets, ruthlessly sucking the life out of mortals to more empower my undead existence. Novelty served as my morality. I threw terrified opponents through the windows of running trains just as quickly as my friend's heaved dumpsters to quash my assailants.
Ah, vampire the masquerade. You were great.
A great roleplaying game. This one wouldn't run either, so I've been working on Clive Barker's The Undying, but that's not due until tomorrow so I get a by for today. Neener neener!
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Freedom Force
I know I promised to set some goals and make up some direction for this blog last time I wrote in, but I've since decided to fuck it. It was already nearly 24 hours since my last update and I didn't want to spend my time waving my dick around trying to decide where to go.
Waving my dick around. Christ, let's hope that I'm not establishing the direction of this blog with that. Class it up, buddy.
Anyway, in an effort to meet the baseline goal that has been floating around the back of my head, I grabbed a disc out of the pile on my kitchen counter and started her up. You see, I think I will make an effort to interact with one of these games a day and write about it. Maybe I will do some research, maybe I will play it for a few minutes, hours, consecutive eight-hour periods, whatever. There are no readers yet, so I'm free to wave my dick around.
In any case, it's quite late in the day (2 AM) and in true Nathan Lane style, I wanted to meet my goal while expending minimum possible effort. The following is that.
I've begun installing Freedom Force. I don't know what has drawn me to this game first. I think that the silly title and frighteningly cliche cover art promises such a great badness that I'll be able to play, lampoon and prepare for bed in the next hour...
As the game installs, my hopes are lifted; while transferring the data from disc to drive the game displays what would purport to be comic book covers related to the game, drawn in generic Marvel/DC comic book style. The game flashes me with the usual panoply of muscled and spandexed homoeroticism. It appears that this will be a sincere jaunt through comic book territory...
Gamespy arcade, computer? Do you take me for a fool? I shall not install that, oh no, I think not...
And register? You can't extort me with your threats of no technical support. No doubt the offices dedicated to technical support for Freedom Force were long ago switched over to another gem in the Irrational Games ouvre. Besides, if you don't work, little Freedom Force, I can quit this and go to bed, one game down...
Launching...
Known compatibility issues. Yes. I may have dodged the bullet. Let's see if it will still run...
A black screen, I am hopeful...
Freedom Force has stopped working! Yes.
I can go to bed. Once I update this miserable blog...
Waving my dick around. Christ, let's hope that I'm not establishing the direction of this blog with that. Class it up, buddy.
Anyway, in an effort to meet the baseline goal that has been floating around the back of my head, I grabbed a disc out of the pile on my kitchen counter and started her up. You see, I think I will make an effort to interact with one of these games a day and write about it. Maybe I will do some research, maybe I will play it for a few minutes, hours, consecutive eight-hour periods, whatever. There are no readers yet, so I'm free to wave my dick around.
In any case, it's quite late in the day (2 AM) and in true Nathan Lane style, I wanted to meet my goal while expending minimum possible effort. The following is that.
I've begun installing Freedom Force. I don't know what has drawn me to this game first. I think that the silly title and frighteningly cliche cover art promises such a great badness that I'll be able to play, lampoon and prepare for bed in the next hour...
As the game installs, my hopes are lifted; while transferring the data from disc to drive the game displays what would purport to be comic book covers related to the game, drawn in generic Marvel/DC comic book style. The game flashes me with the usual panoply of muscled and spandexed homoeroticism. It appears that this will be a sincere jaunt through comic book territory...
Gamespy arcade, computer? Do you take me for a fool? I shall not install that, oh no, I think not...
And register? You can't extort me with your threats of no technical support. No doubt the offices dedicated to technical support for Freedom Force were long ago switched over to another gem in the Irrational Games ouvre. Besides, if you don't work, little Freedom Force, I can quit this and go to bed, one game down...
Launching...
Known compatibility issues. Yes. I may have dodged the bullet. Let's see if it will still run...
A black screen, I am hopeful...
Freedom Force has stopped working! Yes.
I can go to bed. Once I update this miserable blog...
Sunday, November 28, 2010
Inventory and Outlook
Today, I drove a friend to the airport.
We're at that stage in life where we are actually beginning to move out of parents house and our parents are somewhat eager to see the process done.
For my friend, Sam, this means that they are asking him to start emptying his room at home.
For my part, this means that I got a big box of computer games that Sam won't be taking to Chicago with him, but wouldn't like his parents to throw away either. I offered to make a home for them in my lair, and so received them I have.
In the making of this blog post, I have compiled a list of the 60-ish games that he has given me and sorted them into a bunch of semi-meaningless categories borne of an instinct to make meaningless categories derived from flirting with an anthropology major in college. (That is to say, the major itself. I generally would not flirt with anthro majors, as they are somewhat simian in appearance).
Games I Have Never Fucking Heard Of Whatsoever:
Flamescape Torment
Crimson Skies
Arcanum
No One Lives Forever
Blue Stinger
Eraser Turnabout
Prey
Freedom Force (also in category of silly fucking cover art)
Star Trek Voyager: Elite Force
MDK2
SoulBringer
Arcanum
Ultima 4 Ascension
Games That Ring a Bell in a Vague Way That Means Either They Had A Slick Advertising Campaign or a Series or Is a Tie-in to Something Else:
Crimson Skies
Dungeon Siege
Clive Barker's Undying
Deus Ex
The Movies
Doom 3
Fear
Max Payne
Aliens vs Predator
Battlefield 2
Max Payne 2
Tomb Raider: Lost Artifact
Half-Life: Opposing Force
Games I have Played:
Grand Theft Auto Vice City
Sim Tower
Baldurs Gate 2 (two copies)
Warcraft
Warcraft II
Halo
Half-Life 2
Tribes 2
Unreal Tournament
Metal Gear Solid 2
Half-Life
Tom Clancy's Ghost Recon
Black and White
StarCraft
Command and Conquer Red Alert
Roller Coaster Tycoon
Games I Have Never Played But Whose Titles Ring in My Ears With Memories of Reviews of Whispered Awe:
Tomb Raider
Tomb Raider II
System Shock 2
BattleField 1942
Games that I have heard of and have wanted to play regardless of their quality:
Icewind Dale
Icewind Dale II
Warcraft II Expansion
Duke Nukem: Manhattan Project
Neverwinter Nights (if I can find my old BG2 data... oh boy)
Mafia
Baldur's Gate II: The Throne of Bhaal
Games that I have a Queasy Feeling About:
Star Wars: Jedi Knight II: Jedi Outcast
Eraser Turnabout
The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion
Medal of Honor: Allied Assault (so many mediocre MoH games)
Star Wars: Rogue Squadron 3d
Games that I think used to be an easter egg in a word processor:
Microsoft Flight Simulator
Games Whose Titles might be veiled reference to urine:
Unreal Gold
Games that I have role-played:
Vampire: The Masquerade, Redemption
Next Post: I will debate and possibly select goals for these games/game-playing experience.
We're at that stage in life where we are actually beginning to move out of parents house and our parents are somewhat eager to see the process done.
For my friend, Sam, this means that they are asking him to start emptying his room at home.
For my part, this means that I got a big box of computer games that Sam won't be taking to Chicago with him, but wouldn't like his parents to throw away either. I offered to make a home for them in my lair, and so received them I have.
In the making of this blog post, I have compiled a list of the 60-ish games that he has given me and sorted them into a bunch of semi-meaningless categories borne of an instinct to make meaningless categories derived from flirting with an anthropology major in college. (That is to say, the major itself. I generally would not flirt with anthro majors, as they are somewhat simian in appearance).
Games I Have Never Fucking Heard Of Whatsoever:
Flamescape Torment
Crimson Skies
Arcanum
No One Lives Forever
Blue Stinger
Eraser Turnabout
Prey
Freedom Force (also in category of silly fucking cover art)
Star Trek Voyager: Elite Force
MDK2
SoulBringer
Arcanum
Ultima 4 Ascension
Games That Ring a Bell in a Vague Way That Means Either They Had A Slick Advertising Campaign or a Series or Is a Tie-in to Something Else:
Crimson Skies
Dungeon Siege
Clive Barker's Undying
Deus Ex
The Movies
Doom 3
Fear
Max Payne
Aliens vs Predator
Battlefield 2
Max Payne 2
Tomb Raider: Lost Artifact
Half-Life: Opposing Force
Games I have Played:
Grand Theft Auto Vice City
Sim Tower
Baldurs Gate 2 (two copies)
Warcraft
Warcraft II
Halo
Half-Life 2
Tribes 2
Unreal Tournament
Metal Gear Solid 2
Half-Life
Tom Clancy's Ghost Recon
Black and White
StarCraft
Command and Conquer Red Alert
Roller Coaster Tycoon
Games I Have Never Played But Whose Titles Ring in My Ears With Memories of Reviews of Whispered Awe:
Tomb Raider
Tomb Raider II
System Shock 2
BattleField 1942
Games that I have heard of and have wanted to play regardless of their quality:
Icewind Dale
Icewind Dale II
Warcraft II Expansion
Duke Nukem: Manhattan Project
Neverwinter Nights (if I can find my old BG2 data... oh boy)
Mafia
Baldur's Gate II: The Throne of Bhaal
Games that I have a Queasy Feeling About:
Star Wars: Jedi Knight II: Jedi Outcast
Eraser Turnabout
The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion
Medal of Honor: Allied Assault (so many mediocre MoH games)
Star Wars: Rogue Squadron 3d
Games that I think used to be an easter egg in a word processor:
Microsoft Flight Simulator
Games Whose Titles might be veiled reference to urine:
Unreal Gold
Games that I have role-played:
Vampire: The Masquerade, Redemption
Next Post: I will debate and possibly select goals for these games/game-playing experience.
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